Did you ever wonder about love? With Valentine’s Day tomorrow I am sure love is on most people’s minds, including mine. If you knew me you may think it a little weird for me to be thinking about love since I often say that I do not believe it love. However, maybe it is time for me to rethink my thoughts about love and maybe get you think about what love really is.
So why didn’t I believe in love? When I think of love, it is so irrational. No one really knows what it is and when you ask someone how they know they are in love they often say “I just know.” If you read my post about soul mates you may already know how I feel about that phrase. I do not accept that as an answer. People often say that they are in love and when they move on to their next love interest they say they didn’t know what love was or they were young and stupid. If that is the case then how do they know their current love is love? The whole thing just gets me frustrated.
Another thing that messed up my perception of love is movies. The love that is shown in movies seems so amazing. The two people do anything for each other usually have grand romantic gesture in the end. I never see these things in real life. I never hear stories about people traveling halfway around the world to show their love. I never see people run 20 blocks through the city to make it to the airport to tell someone how they feel. This may be because I have only been to an airport once, but that beside the point. I never see things like this in real life. People will tell me that is because movie love is not real love but I do not see why love can’t be like that. It’s not like the things that are done in the movies are totally unrealistic. Okay, some things maybe but not all of it and I don’t see why that can’t be love in real life.
All this aside, I have come to realize that I do believe in love. However, I believe it is much rarer than people believe. People say they are in love far too often for me and I am not only talking about the teenagers who have been dating for a week and they say they are in love. I am talking about everyone really. No matter what age you are or how many people you have dated, I think you have the potential to be one of these people who say they are in love when they don’t even know what love is. I am in no way saying I know what love is or how to tell if you are in love but I think a lot of people pretend they do. The best is when I hear it from the people who say they know what love is because they have dated 7 people and been through it all. Really? Were you ever married for 40 years and have been through real hardship? I didn’t think so. I am not saying that you have to be married for 40 years to know what love is either. What I am saying is that I have no idea what love is and I think neither do a lot of people who think they do.
Since I think love is so rare, I think it would be hard for me to fall in love. This is probably why I didn’t believe in love. I am a guy who thinks more with his brain than his heart and one who doesn’t really deal with emotions. However if I did fall in love, I could see it happening one of two ways. One is the classic best friend turned into true love. I have heard that the best marriages are the one where you marry your best friend and I think there is something to this. Think about it, when you are with your best friend you aren’t worried about being judged, you are always yourself, and you can have fun doing almost anything. The thing about this is that I usually have a couple of friends that are girls. It is not like I have that one friend, who is a girl, who I always go to for advice or thing such as that. So I do not know if this is the way but it could change in the future.
The second way seems to be the one I favor more: serendipity. I probably favor this way because it is more of a movie style encounter. You are just walking down the street one day, turn the counter, and bump into your future wife. Your eyes lock and. . . I am just kidding, I am not going to get that sappy with this. However, you have a little moment that changes your entire life. This is another reason why I think I like this one. I think it is amazing how very little moments can change your life in a lot of ways, so meeting the person you love in a moment like this is appealing to be.
There could be a combination of the two though. I meet my best friend serendipitously (not sure if that is a word or not) and then we fall in love. Whatever the way may be I still have not answered the question of how I will know but have no fear, I have come up with a test for that. Being a logical guy, one of the reasons I had problem believing the illogical idea of love, I am not going to leave it up to “just knowing.” The test starts off with a dog. When I get order and live on my own, I am going to have a dog. My friends know, I like dogs more than people sometimes. I am the epitome of dog as man’s best friend. So how does my dog fit into any of this? When I find a girl that I care about more than my dog, that is when I will know I am in love. This may sound crazy but to me it makes perfect sense and a heck of a lot more sense than “just knowing.”
However, maybe I am wrong about all of this. Maybe I will turn into one of those people who end up saying I thought I was in love but I didn’t know what love was. Maybe I will become one of those people who start saying they are in love far too often. Maybe I will change my thoughts on love completely. I do not see this happening since I am not a big relationship guy. Not to say I am a womanizer or anything like that, I choose not to deal with the drama of it all. That’s a story for a different day though. Life is crazy and things change so I guess I can never know. I wouldn’t mind if I was proven wrong and had a girl come and changes my views completely. Will that happen? I guess only time can tell.
What are your thoughts on love?